((and no matter how loud the music is, the feeling is still there))
i just don't want to sit here and think. i've had enough of thinking, i've had enough of disappointment, i've had enough of myself.
...
i want amnesia.
come and spend some time with me
and we will spend it all at sea
my mum and i drove out to the ocean to sit on a bench. we must have looked very tranquil because a guy came up and asked to take a photo.
so that was odd.
nagendra berated me because "you always get take-away! you should eat-in one of these days!". so yes, i have a coffee date with myself some time next week. and see, this is different from every other time because i get to tip the waiterperson. woo for me.
((hey kid, get yourself something nice))
my room is still a mess. i don't know why i expected it to change in the time that i've been typing this. but i did. and it hasn't.
...
i want amnesia.
i'd actually forgotten that i'd wanted to see a ballet; la fille mal gard�e. i've never been to the ballet. it looks like i'll never go to this one though; it ends in three days.
so there goes my chance to see chickens dance en pointe.
things currently on my floor;
- a lone black&pink sock
- a pink texta
- a glass tumbler
- superglue
- butterknife
- school diary
- six coathangers
- an annotated bibliography
- etc, etc
...
i want amnesia.
i want to take it all back.
i am afraid.afraid.afraid.
i don't want to think.
i don't want to think.
i don't want to think.
...