knees curled to my heart,
in the corner of the courtyard.
i think you must be having lunch with friends,
gauging the distance from now until tomorrow.
you do not chew your pen
you would hardly spend time alone,
except perhaps when travelling.
soon it is friday & i
have crawled out of bed,
arriving at university
with an oversized bag
& unbrushed hair.
so having analysed the analysis of science,
i find myself returning
to this place i have avoided.
exhale out of relief,
it appears we will not meet.
but turning from the table i see
that you have been having breakfast
& recognised me. dressed all in black,
with your head dipped low, but staring
in any case. clearly concerned as
my eyes follow others, who take books
from beside the packets of sugar.
i don't have the patience
or capacity, for engaging
in fiveminuteromances
on friday mornings
between lectures.
oh-so-quickly i make my exit,
take to the road ruled by pedestrians
& become a neuroscientist in a matter of minutes.
hardly knowing my way around the brain
((excepting the spaces left only for safety))
i set memory alight & repeat an act twice.
that evening i
meet friends under early stars
to have dinner & drinks & lose
all balance in the streets,
mexican wave as cabs streak by &
sit in windows of ice-cream parlours
to sober up from white wine & argue,
then speak quietly in the cinema.
spill out into the cold
& grapple with coats,
photograph the lights
they are so pretty.
we run through
an empty intersection
while shrieking & walk
your dog twice around the block.
it is midnight, we seem rather crazy,
but conversation that flows this easy
is the hardest thing to end abruptly.
with a kiss on the cheek
the night is over. i return home
to fall into bed &
stop.